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Literature Text
Blade meets the skin
So cold and burning
For comforts of agony
So knowingly illogical
A child indoctrinated
To feel ugly within
To feel insufficient
For this judging world
Blade an instant fix
For all that's broken
Beyond repair
Beyond reason
Self-hate grows
Like an infection
It spreads through the body
It urges hot blood
Out of swollen veins
Made to believe
In ugliness within
Taught to be afraid
And to never trust
Blade curves a picture
A portrait of the soul
For no eyes to see
For no hand to touch
Made to believe
In permanence of pain
In the rule of darkness
Over night and day
So cold and burning
For comforts of agony
So knowingly illogical
A child indoctrinated
To feel ugly within
To feel insufficient
For this judging world
Blade an instant fix
For all that's broken
Beyond repair
Beyond reason
Self-hate grows
Like an infection
It spreads through the body
It urges hot blood
Out of swollen veins
Made to believe
In ugliness within
Taught to be afraid
And to never trust
Blade curves a picture
A portrait of the soul
For no eyes to see
For no hand to touch
Made to believe
In permanence of pain
In the rule of darkness
Over night and day
Literature
Drowning
I reach my hand
And you grab it
I pull back and
Plead you to quit
I am drowning but I
Do not need you nearby
All you do is stop me
From sinking in the sea
I shout for you
And you reply
I try not to
Make you come by
I try again
You are not there
I cry instead
Does no one care?
I am drowning but I...
Get back!
No, hither
Attack!
I dither...
One more try, I'll
Show them the pain
No more fake smile
No more I'll feign
Why do they touch
My hand so cold
It is too much
I just withhold
I am drowning and I
Do not need them nearby
Literature
Secrets
The archives bursting at the seams A crack slithering on the walls How long can be those secrets kept till the snake grows and the dam falls the paper in the darkness gleams? How long can be those secrets kept Words wrapped in the thickest covers Is this how your design congealed Friends turned into hateful brothers feelings scorned and the trust bewept? Is this how your design congealed Of honesty to be bereft? Open the archives, drain the dam until there is nothing left but the naked truth revealed
Literature
Your Problems are Music
No sorry soul
Should drink fire
Just because they’re sorry.
Don’t expect solutions,
But you can fill me
With your world, too.
This is a two-straw-one-cup arrangement
Where the bill splits even.
Besides, I’m curious.
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We were made to believe.. can we undo the indoctrination?
I experimented with the form a little bit here - the tempo of the 3rd stanza represents the rush of emotions that come on during hurting yourself - raw, unreasonable, destructive. Then it all quiets down and one can return to a state of semi-sanity and self-reflection.
I experimented with the form a little bit here - the tempo of the 3rd stanza represents the rush of emotions that come on during hurting yourself - raw, unreasonable, destructive. Then it all quiets down and one can return to a state of semi-sanity and self-reflection.
I also wanted to describe the paradox of self-hurt in the 5th stanza. Many people say that self-harm is a cry for help. The opposite is often true. Many people who self-hurt never share that information, especially not with the loved ones. There is a lot of embarrassment and the general feeling of not being 'safe' to share what you do to yourself.
I recently read a great book about this that explains some of the paradoxes and urges of self-harm, "The language of injury". Highly recommend to everyone who wants to breakaway from the indoctrination of being insufficient and deserving pain.
© 2017 - 2024 Elendurwen
Comments13
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Good one
I like the descreption of the feelings. Pretty accurate
I like the descreption of the feelings. Pretty accurate